Oh Edward...
Am I rid of you at last?
Dear Goddess, I hope so.
I'm just wondering...
what is this "world of lies" I told? Tell me, when did I lie to you? Because last time I checked, you A) lied to me about being over your little girl toy friend, B) lied to me about being in love with me, C) lied to me about the reasons why you dumped me, and then proceeded to confess all when you were drunk two weeks later... I really could go on. So tell me, Edward, because I'm really wracking my brain trying to figure this out-- WHAT LIES DID I TELL YOU?! WHEN DID I LIE TO YOU!? Are you referring to the fact I tried to open up to you about my past? Because everything I said was true. I was a little confused (abuse will do that to you, but you wouldn't know about that...) and some things still don't add up even to me, but I don't remember a single lie I told you other than "I'm fine without you" when you left. So Edward, I'd really love for you to explain-- WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!?
You try to make me feel guilty because I want nothing to do with you? How the hell does that work?
Do you know me at all?
...wait, you don't. Forgot about that part.
Wait.
I remember the lie I told you.
I do remember that one.
It was when you walked in on me getting myself off in the bathroom.
I told you I was checking a small tear down there that I received from a pap smear.
It was the first thing I could think of off the top of my head to keep you from knowing that I FAKED EVERY FUCKING ORGASM AND I HAD TO FINISH THE JOB YOU HALF HALFHEARTEDLY STARTED BECAUSE NOT ONLY DO YOU NOT KNOW ONE FUCKING THING ABOUT THE FEMALE ANATOMY, BUT YOU DON'T GIVE A SHIT TO LEARN BECAUSE YOU ARE THE MOST SELFISH FUCKING PERSON ON THE FACE OF THE GODDAMN PLANET AND THE BEDROOM IS NO EXCEPTION YOU MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!!!!!
...yeah, I remember that lie.
I'm not sorry.
I had gotten to a point where I really hoped you were happy.
...yeah, I definitely relapsed tonight. I still hope you burn in hell.
Love, Kicks and Punches With My Best Pair of Brass Knuckles,
Ms. Annie.
picture this, if you will:
- Ms. Annie Creamcheese
- so many years ago...
- I was born in 1874 in Paris to a pair of sea turtles who were violently in love, though their passions were kept secret as they were locked in loveless marriages at the time-- my mother to a ruthless Duke, my father to a bar wench who favored gambling. However, their torrid affair turned sour after my mother, Marzipan, caught my father in bed with a golf club and thus ended both their lives. Shortly after their tragic demise I was adopted by a colony of glow worms and raised in Haiti until my coming of age; I then conquered Valhalla with the help of my trusty house cats, Annabelle and Rupert. I am now attending school to become lava lamp engineer with hopes to own a brothel someday.
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Please keep in mind that I don't give a flying fuck.